Memory Lane / Wenk-ism #1.

I was just reading through an old blog of mine, and I realized that yeeeeeeaaaaars later, I am exactly the same person. I'm in the same boat as I was in five or six years ago.

It's so weird.

Yes, I still watch a truckload of Reality TV (and I'm still as greatly affected by the final outcome of shows as I was back then), and I still love revel bars. But it's more than that. Aside from liking the same things, it freaks me out that I wrote / said things that I would still write / say to this day... in pretty much the same way. (Well, isn't that obvious!? I'm still the same person, right?!)

My rants and my frustrations back then were pretty much the same things I rant about at present. I wrote constantly about my insecurities, and not being good enough for even myself. I wrote about how much I wished I could write about everything, but could not seem to write about anything that mattered.

However, after reading through a bunch of old blog posts, I found myself feeling envious of how freely I could express what I was feeling back then. I didn't care about the amount of personal information I was releasing on the World Wide Web, and I obviously didn't care if I sounded like a bubbly, sugar high kid in one blog post, and a psychotic, emotionally unstable weirdo in the next. Oh. And I obviously never heard of proofreading back then. *blush*

The thing is, I've been blogging for YEARS. No, I couldn't quite convince myself to blog daily--not even weekly (and I still can't). But, I've blogged enough to get quite a lot of thoughts and raw emotions written down.

And because this is my blog, and you can't do anything about it, I'd like to revive some of the things I said. Not because they were particularly clever or funny (although some of the things I said really were quite clever / funny...) but because they're still pretty much what I would say now.

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October 29, 2004

i love being able to rant and express whatever thoughts rattle and bounce around in my mind. i love hearing the clickety-clack of the keyboard as my fingers on the keyboard try to match the speed of the words in my head.

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Twenty-six.

I could never really stick to New Year's Resolutions. I also never really saw the logic behind posting them online for the world to see (although I'm pretty sure I did that in past blogs). Come to think of it, there IS more pressure to stick to them, because everyone knows what they are :P

This year, I am determined to:

Clean my room.

Be more productive.

Save.

Dress more like an adult.

Act like one, too.

Read more books.

Save.

Write more.

Travel more.

Have some "me time".

Exercise.

Save.

De-clutter.

Save.

So there you go: my goals for the year (and these are all goals I really should keep for the rest of my life). Now to stick to them.

Pressing the Rewind Button.

There's no better time to be thankful for your blessings then on the last day of the year. 2009 was a tough year, but there are sooooooooo many things to be thankful for. I will not name ALL my blessings one by one, but I'll sum it up to the best of my ability:

I am thankful for my family. Although this is the first holiday season my family is not geographically complete, I am glad that distance does not stop my family from being a family. We laugh, we talk, and we laugh some more. I am also thankful for today's technology, which allows us to stay in touch, whether we are meters or miles apart. I am blessed to be part of this family, and at the end of the day, there is nowhere else I'd rather be but home.

I am thankful for my niece and nephew. Yes, they are technically part of the family, and I have already expressed how thankful I am to have them--but these two little runts are always the highlight of my day. I am fascinated by how much they can change on a daily basis, how quickly they learn new tricks, and what amazing people they are already turning out to be at such young ages. Because of these two babies, I am more appreciative of life and its wonders :)

I am thankful for friends. As you get older, you gain some friends, but you also fall out of touch with the others. 2009 was pretty much a year of renewing and solidifying old friendships. Yay for that! :)

I am thankful for lessons learned in 2009. I've made some drastic life choices, and I do not regret them. I believe that I am in more tune with myself than I have ever been--and this is something I truly consider an accomplishment.

I am thankful that I have had time to read more books (which I have really missed doing), and that although I am no longer employed full time, I can still afford to purchase these books--and have the occasional salmon sashimi!

And last but definitely not the least, I am thankful for another year with JV. I am even more thankful, because I KNOW that there are many, many, many more years with JV to come :)

Bring it on, 2010!

Happy new year! :)