Poltroon.

Okay, so pretty much everyone (who has to drive for me) knows that I can't drive. Is that a flaw? Yes. I'll admit it--I'm scared. I'm a nervous rider. So sue me.

Unfortunately, that's not why I'm admitting I'm a weakling.

Let me tell you a story.

For the past couple of days, I've been having little anxiety attacks when it would be time to sleep and turn off the lights in my room. It's not that I'm scared of the dark or anything... (well fine, that's another story).

You see, one evening, I stood up from bed to turn off the lights by the door of my room. When I was about to press the switch, I noticed that there was a long strand of hair stuck behind the light switch. After a couple of seconds, I realized that there were TWO strands of hair caught between the wall and the light switch. And then. It hit me.

IT WAS A COCKROACH.

The so-called "strands of hair" weren't moving, and I knew that the vermin was dead. But just knowing that there was a cockroach right there--right under that thin light switch panel--holy crap. No words could ever describe the mixed feelings of disgust, panic, and fear.

The annoying thing is that I kept forgetting about it--until it would dawn on me during the evening that I hadn't asked anyone to take it out. I would always curse myself for being so stupid, turn off the lights as carefully and quickly as I could, swear I'd have it taken out the next day, and go to sleep.

This afternoon, I finally remembered to tell my dad about it. He took a look at the ferocious insect, laughed at me, and let it be.

Thank God I asked one of the helpers to get it out. Tonight, my wall is cockroach-free. My light switch is accessible. I'm free.

The thing is, I have another problem.

There's another cockroach that's been appearing in my bathroom for the past three evenings. The first night, I saw it in the shoe cabinet (mental note: wash slippers with alcohol tomorrow). Of course, being the brave soul that I am, I closed the door and ran.

Last night, I saw the cockroach crawling on the chair in my dressing room. I made sure the closets were shut, closed the door, and ran. I poured half a bottle of alcogel on the chair this afternoon.

I also asked the helper (who saved the day by getting rid of the first cockroach) to leave a can of RAID in my dressing room. Tonight, I would be prepared. I would be brave. I would be ready.

But tonight, I saw it scampering about on the bathroom tiles. I hopped my way back to safety. I looked around for the can of RAID... and didn't find it.

Panic.

And this is the story of why, at 3:30 in the morning, I went downstairs to pee.